A Whole New Me

Recently my son and I got our name change paperwork in the mail. It was a moment I can’t quite describe. I could begin with excited, honored, a touch sad and truly looking forward to our future {whatever it may hold}. Our future is so damn beautiful and as I shift from codependency recovery to feeling fully healthy and recovered, I am honored to emerge as a whole new me; a whole new us.
When I first got divorced I didn’t change my name for a number of reasons. Professionally it feels good to be Jenny Ravikumar and I will potentially stay as such. It’s who I am as a business owner, and the person I’ve grown into. The changing of my name helped me to throw my shoulders back and step into a roll of leadership I would’ve been to nervous to walk into if I didn’t have a new name, a new identity.
I was nervous to change back to my “maiden” name for a number of reasons.
  1. I am no longer a “maiden” and think it should be referred to as family name of origin.
  2. The power I had created in my mind with this name was powerful and I wasn’t sure I would be able to hold onto it when I shifted to my name of origin.
  3. I always want to be connected to my son; energetically, legally and also in name.
  4. Most importantly, I am not who I used to be. In the last few years I have grown and emerged into someone I could’ve never imagined I would become. I’m strong and wise. God put me on an imaginary episode of Law + Order I never signed up for and the last few years I have learned more about myself as a person, a mother and a business owner than I ever believed possible.
With all that said, I know how important names are. They give the world a snapshot of who you are. They connect you to others.
Names are powerful. Some people can carry a name that is simply one word. Prince. Beyonce. Madonna. Some names are simple yet beautiful; Jane Smith. Other names are gorgeous and take a moment to pronounce perfectly; Nazahaah Amin. Some names are old {Betty} and some are brand new {Cash}.
Every name has a story – no matter if it was your parents “liking it” or a family name passed down through the years. Perhaps your name has a deeply intentional meaning or maybe your parents watched their favorite TV show while they were pregnant with you. Add in marriage, divorce, gender transitions, growing out of your name, general life changes and you find all kinds of stories embedded within a name.
A name introduces you to the world and yet it’s just a single piece of who you are.

“Whats in a name? That which we call a rose/By any other name would smell as sweet” – Shakespeare

I am still me. No matter what my license says.
I will always hold a piece of Jenny Ravikumar with me in my heart. She taught me about motherhood, business ownership, leadership, love, trauma and codependency recovery. She embraced her writing and began sharing her words with the world. Jenny Ravikumar learned that on the other side of divorce, there isn’t death – but rather a life of joy that I work towards daily. She reminded me to smile daily, even while navigating the courthouse through restraining orders, custody hearings and tax fraud. And most importantly, she showed me I had a backbone that I wasn’t ever sure I knew existed.
I will always hold a piece of the (original) Jenny Lane. She who trusted without any fear, loved deeply and once made a fondant cake in August just to help add joy to someones day. Jenny Lane learned how to give, how to create with love and how to laugh (really loudly). She is and forever will be working on her “indoor voice” and will always be the loudest one in the room; though to be fair, she has a tiny 33 pound competitor she created.
Today I am ready to embrace this new version of Jenny Lane. I’m ready to feel fully healed, to love deeper and to step into this new decade with my shoulders back and my heart continuously open. It’s my time to step into a role of leadership; to continue expanding my brick and mortar yoga studio alongside building a foundation for my non-profit. I am going to continue showing my son that you can do anything you put your mind to. I’m ready to step into the fear, joy and deep dive of love and what that holds in our future; celebrating new beginnings and creating a life we are proud to live every day. Walking toward this new decade with a beautiful foundation in business, and my incredibly smart, handsome and kind son, it’s time for me to emerge.

My job is to guide others through my teaching and writing. As I step into the newest version of my name, I plan to continue this journey as authentically and honestly as I can. The days aren’t always easy, but I promise to always shine light for you (and I) wherever I can.

As much as I am doing this as an individual, I am honored to be doing this alongside my divine beam of light. Having my son share my name makes me feel humble joy in every way possible. I will be forever connected to my favorite little man in every way imaginable.
I don’t know what the future holds, but I can tell you I am not “going back” to being Jenny Lane {nor the jokes about Forest Gump, Penny or Lois}. As I transition, I am embracing this new version of who she is. Joyful, excited and light up are just a handful of words I can find in this moment as I write to you from the local RMV.

This new decade is going to be beautiful.

In the comments below, share your desire for this coming decade. Are you excited, joyful, full of love? Are you manifesting new love, a new job or a major life shift? Is it time for you embrace who you are?
I cannot wait to hear what you’re up to.
Love, light + beautiful joy

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